No more Irish car bombs ever.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
