Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize