Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
