This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
