I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Randomize
