So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I just want to make out with him forever
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
