What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Randomize