I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
