You really coming over, don't trick.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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