she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
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