i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
