Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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