I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Come see our sink grown plant.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
