idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
