i would punch a child for taco bell
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
