Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
