Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
ttyl tear gas
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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