She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
