Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Randomize
