There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
