and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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