11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
