BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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