white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
