Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
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