I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
