We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize