p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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