Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
FUCK WHALES
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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