That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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