apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I know her cup size but not her name....
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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