in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize