Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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