He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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