nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
either way he was missing a nipple.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
We don't watch enough power rangers
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
