let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
farters have to be the big spoon...
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
COCAINE IS GR8
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
