this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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