When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
