You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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