She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize