At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Randomize
