Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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