Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Two words: blizzard sex
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
