So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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