Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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