Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
