Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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