i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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