he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
