He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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