And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize