Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
party gras won. party gras always wins.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
