so that wasnt chicken after all
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
